stories from yin lan story books

what is he thinking ?

I'm more than confused. I've been going out with his guy, on & off for over two years, right now it is off. But only because he wants it that way.

we were so great tgt, and i know he loved me alot: more than anyone he has been with . we had some prob, and we broke up. we got back tgt twice, and the 2nd time we were having a difficult time. I was willing to hang in there, thought because i really loved him .

one day, he announced it was over. i took it pretty hard because i still love him, what is really confusy, though, is he seens to have just turned his feeling off. It is like he never felt anything for me. He wont talk to me, he wont return my call or sms . and this has been going on for months. I still love him though, what should i do ? pls help me to understand why someone whould get like this ,

Kim reply

i wish i could say that this is hightly unusual behavior, but i can't. believe it or not, it is rather common. simply put, he get hurt and he is determined not to get hurt again.
maybe he realized it would never work, or maybe he did "just get over you". but if that were the case, he would not be acting like he is.
if someone is really over you, they wouldn't need to not talk to you. there would be no reason to be cruel. when you are over someone, you behave apathetically.
as for a solution, don't know. i guess the best thing would be for you yo let go and move on, but that isn't easy, eapecially when things are so unprocessed, so up in the air.
you could try to write him a letter, in that letter, you could tell him how you feel. no blame!! no attacking ... just how you feel.
he might respond, but the bottom line is this: he may not. you may had to let it go.
i know someone who went through this same exact thing. when she got over the guy and started liking someone else, he called her. in this call, he admitted to her that he never stopped loving her, and he wanted to give it another try. she was, however, over him, and they never did forget that bittersweet moment
when he admitted his feelings. how she would have loved to have known this on the nights she spent crying herself to sleep. thus them saying: love stinks!!